The groom the night before his wedding went to a restaurant with his best man and groomsman and had a little too much to drink. That night, he called his fiancée’ from the restaurant and told her about the last few anxious days. She wasn’t even phased. “It’s a crazy week, isn’t it?” she said.
The next day, whilst standing waiting for his bride to walk down the aisle (which was approximately ten minutes), he told me that he had a very bad headache and felt sick but he just attributed it to nerves and being very anxious. I asked the groom if he had taken anything for the headache – he said no, I mentioned that I had some headache tablets in the car in my first aid kit and asked if he wanted some, he said yes, so I quickly rushed to the car to get them together with some water. At some point during the ceremony, he clamped his hand over his mouth. I asked him if he was ok, and if he wanted a couple of minutes, he said that he was ok and we continued, after I introduced them and sent the couple back down the red carpet. They got outside and he just lost it all.
It turned out after I spoke to them again a couple of weeks later that it was the highlight of everyone’s day. He told me that he spoke to his Dad a couple of days before the wedding, who had been a witness to his peculiar breed of anxiety for 27 years, said the most powerful thing: “This wedding is going to happen no matter what, so there’s no use fighting it.” To normal people, that may seem like an extremely odd thing to say, but let me explain he said. Anxious people live with a perpetual monkey on their back. We feel responsible for, guilty about and a prisoner to our thoughts. By telling him that this feeling he had wasn’t going to ruin anything, his dad had freed him from the burden.
To any of you who suffer from generalised anxiety and are feeling off right now, let me reassure you: Your anxiety isn’t sending you any sort of hidden message. If you didn’t want to get married, you would have been having nagging doubts for a while, not just this sudden burst in an otherwise great relationship. Let go of the burden and guilt. Know that you’re not alone. And most importantly, know that your wedding is going to happen, no matter how much you worry about it.
– Graham Maughan Celebrant Central Coast, Hunter Valley, Lake Macquarie, Newcastle, Port Stephens and Northern Sydney
I am a professional Marriage / Civil Celebrant based on the Central Coast, duly authorised by the Attorney General for the Commonwealth of Australia to Solemnise a marriage.
I will make your day the “Time of Your Life”. I want your ceremony to be the true embodiment of the feelings that you wish to share with your very special loved one, family and your closest friends.